symondrake » Random

The butler’s rolling pin (and 20 other differences)

Symon — Thu, 03 Dec 2009 09:52:00 +0000

The clip below is extremely well done and very entertaining. I bet your bottom dollar you will view it more than once.

Anyone for a game of Cluedo?

Don’t get sucked in… pass it on

Symon — Thu, 19 Nov 2009 06:40:00 +0000

Did you know that the word gullible has been taken out of the English dictionary?

Actually no, it hasn’t, but you’d be amazed at the amount of people that have responded “Really?” to that verbal statement over the years. A cheap and nasty joke I admit, but good enough entertainment nonetheless.

You’d be amazed at the amount of emails I receive weekly informing me that…

… I need to send money to fund little Maria’s cancer treatment or else she will die,
… I apparently have long lost Nigerian relatives who want to give me millions of dollars,
… I must protest against the movie being made portraying Jesus as a homosexual,
… I need to pass this on to ten people or else something bad will happen to me,
… I need to pass this on to ten people and Microsoft will give me a free laptop,
… I need to have more than 8.1 children or else the Muslims will take over the world,
… I just witnessed authentic video footage of two New Zealanders getting attacked by Bigfoot,

Yadda yadda yadda

Quite frankly, responding to well-meaning (but gullible) people gets a little tiring at times.

So, let me give you the great advice I give them…

1. Don’t believe everything you read.
2. Wikipedia and Youtube do occasionally tell lies.
3. Learn that www.snopes.com is your friend.

In conclusion, if you share this post this on Facebook, all your wildest dreams will come true

Save the fluffy bunny!

Symon — Thu, 05 Nov 2009 07:00:00 +0000

I remember dissecting a rabbit at high school… while my friend fainted. Good memories.

Now a couple of decades later, at approx 8:01pm I stumbled upon a fluffy bunny in desperate need of life-saving surgery… with only a minute to operate.

Talk about pressure.

The story has a happy ending (after three attempts). House would have been proud.

Click here to operate on fluffy bunny too

The Mair Park Bigfoot pays off

Symon — Tue, 06 Oct 2009 04:01:00 +0000

Many moons ago while surfing Amazon’s Listmanias I came across an author by the name of Jeremy Robinson. To cut a long story short, he was running a viral video contest to promote his new book, Pulse. I bribed my good buddy Lesmondj into spending a Saturday afternoon in the bush and what eventuated was two versions of the now infamous Bigfoot attack video (over 10,000 hits now on Metacafe and YouTube).

We won by a landslide, the closest (and only) opponent trailing by 9000ish hits (but who’s counting) and I was delighted to recieve the promised books last week.

A massive THANKYOU to Jeremy Robinson for the very generous prize (and for forking out mega moolah for the postage). Please check out his site here.

And for all those dying to know how the movie magic was created, here is some Bigfoot Attack Footage trivia…

1. No, the Bigfoot wasn’t real. There was more than one concerned person thinking the footage was authentic. Lesmondj and I must have the mean acting skills (and girls dig guys who have skills…).

2. The entire attack scene was done on the first take… with an imagined Bigfoot, yes imagined, not real.

3. Jon Dylan used his computer hacking skills to overlay the Bigfoot sound effects (purchased from Itunes for $1.79).

4. Apparently, the Bigfoot growls sound identical to a real Bigfoot, as one reader commented (as she deals with them on a daily basis – seriously).

5. The Mair Park Ghost legend is mostly true.

6. On the short version, Yes, the blood was real… from my nose. Don’t ask.

7. The rotting bone at the cave’s entrance (tedious version) was stolen from my dog.

8. Lesmondj spent the majority of the attack scene voluntarily lying in a puddle of water. The mark of a true friend.

9. There was no script.

View the short (and exhilirating) version below:

Footage of Bigfoot Attack? – Click here for more blooper videos

View the long (but informative) version below:

…like I change my underwear

Symon — Wed, 09 Sep 2009 08:33:00 +0000

Welcome to my new and improved blog. You like? I tend to grow tired of my blog layout at least once a year, and on a whim today I changed it.

My wife says I change my mind like I change my underwear. I disagree… I change my undies everyday (sometimes twice). She wonders why I keep changing a perfectly good-looking blog. I guess I get bored easily… seeing the same layout everyday (sometimes twice). Besides, I enjoy the process of upgrading, learning new stuff, change etc.

Problem is, you can’t please everyone, and I have already received conflicting comments. For example… “Great layout!” and “Blue looks cheap, I liked your old one better”. Hmmmmm.

So, I put it out to you, my blog friends, to decide. Please post a comment and let me know if you like it or not, and why.

I may be tempted to change my mind… like I change my underwear.

What’s really lurking down the plughole

Symon — Sat, 05 Sep 2009 08:41:00 +0000

I had to unblock the bathroom sink the other evening… joy. With the help of a crochet hook borrowed from PaisleyJade (yes, they really are good for something), I was able to pull out what I can only describe as a greeny, slimy, smelly, hairy, stringy goop that had to be seen to be believed. What caused it? Who knows… who wants to know? Which got me thinking…

Does anyone really know what lurks in the pipes under our houses? One recent discovery has been aptly titled ‘The sewer monster’ (see clip below).

They are saying that the monster is nothing more than masses of Tubifex worms… but I say that is very debatable. If you watch the monster closely, you will notice that it has what looks like a membrane enveloping it, unlike worms, and it is above the water, unlike worms, and it retreats from light as one organism, unlike worms (see clip below).

To conclude, I wonder if what I pulled up out of the plughole was a decomposing ‘sewer monster’? My advice is don’t get too close to the plughole next time you brush your teeth.

(Why am I thinking about the facehugger from Alien right now?)

The world’s fastest Indian Murray

Symon — Thu, 03 Sep 2009 22:39:00 +0000

Welcome to the third and hopefully final installment of the Murray lawn tractor trilogy.

If you have been following my posts, you would have, by now, been educated in the finer points of Murray lawn tractors, specifically Racer-Murray and Monster-Murray.

And now, let me introduce you to… Speed-Demon Murray.

If you have ever wondered, as I have, how fast a lawn tractor can go (with stock engine… the record is a whopping 130 km/h!

I could mow my lawn in less than a minute

Meet Murray’s BIG brother

Symon — Wed, 02 Sep 2009 22:08:00 +0000

Continuing on with my current ‘Murray the retro lawn tractor” theme… I stumbled across the above pic of a pimped Monster Murray. Alriiiiight.

There is something to be said about yanks and their obsession with taking anything with a piston and souping it up… even if it is the humble lawnmower.

You don’t believe me? Check out: www.xtrememowermayhem.com.

Stay tuned for Part 3 of my Murray trilogy tomorrow.

Murray, the 80′s lawn tractor

Symon — Wed, 02 Sep 2009 08:56:00 +0000

We live on a 3/4 acre property, which has the potential to be pure awesomeness. The problem is this: big purely awesome property = big purely painful maintenance, and those of you who know me will testify that maintenance is definitely my middle name.

One reason why I decided to buy the property in the first place was that I saw a ride-on lawn mower (lawn-tractor) on Trademe for $400 Buy Now, and just couldn’t pass up a bargain like that. Everyone knows that you need a big back yard to warrant buying a ride-on. Heh.

Enter Murray.

Murray is my ’84 red lawn tractor. He’s seen a lot of action in his long lifetime, but alas, isn’t the sprightly shiny red hot-rod he used to be. Almost every time he cuts the grass now, something breaks down or falls off, and due to my extreme lack of maintenance skills, I spend most of the mowing time, doing a Macgyver on Murray. Meh.

For example… Murray’s battery is flat. In fact, I took the battery out a few weeks ago to get it charged but keep forgetting to borrow the charger from my dad-in-law. So I jump start Murray with the people-mover, but a spring-clip on the jumper lead is broken, and I forgot to mention, Murray’s starter switch is long gone… To cut a long story short (too late), I have to hot-wire Murray with one hand and hold the jumper cable on the terminal with the other (not an easy feat).

Murray’s drive belt came off 5 times today, and after the fifth jump start I got sick of the shenanigans and went off to the ride-on mower shop to buy a new belt.
The man asked me what model lawn-tractor I had, and what year… I said ‘Murray’ and ‘old’.

Don’t feel too sorry for Murray though. His future is very bright. One day when his grass-cutting days are over, he is going to have a new lease on life.

Lawn tractor racing.

I have just discovered that old Murray’s are hugely popular in the US of A for hotting-up and racing. Yeehaar!

Post a day for the month of September

Symon — Tue, 01 Sep 2009 11:44:00 +0000

It’s 11.49pm and PaisleyJade has been harassing me to start blogging regularly again. Well, blow me down, I’m gonna attempt a post-a-day-for-the-month-of-September (has a certain ring to it, don’t you think?).

11.52pm. Thinking, thinking… Eureka!

I hereby dedicate September’s first post to the one and only LesmondJ.

(I’ll think of something more intelligent to blog about tomorrow… 6 minutes away